Eyes for Faith

Author: Nauplius

Original post: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

Entry for YC125 New Eden Capsuleer’s Writing Contest in the Academic/News/Gossip category.

Part 1

Achuran actress Mayumi Sasaki gave an interview to the Gallentean entertainment tabloid “Impetus Today” regarding her upcoming holoreel Eyes for Faith, produced by the Amarrian Orthodox Church, Sedevacantist.

Tell us about your character.
I play “Cheeky”, an Achuran pilot recruited by the evil Stargazers to seduce and assassinate sedevacantist heroine “Chastity”, performed by Amirah Damali. But along the way, Cheeky and Chastity fall in love, and instead they join together to overthrow the evil Stargazers and liberate the Achuran people from Caldari oppression.

You weren’t the first choice for the role.
The first two girls succumbed to the gyrations of Amirah’s hips during one of the holoreel’s many vigorous love scenes, one with a fractured pelvis, the other with a bruised kidney. So I got surgically implanted steel rebar in my abdomen to prevent me from suffering the same fate. Um, when I asked them to take it out after shooting was over, they said I might need it for the sequel, so I’ve still got it.

What was the audition like?
The hardest thing I ever had to do in my life. They made me run an obstacle course wearing stiletto high heels, occasionally impaling a target dummy by kicking it with my heels something I will do a lot in Eyes for Faith. I almost quit, but then I remembered what playing Chastity did for Amirah’s career and that gave my the extra motivation to complete the course.

What was the weirdest thing that happened on set?
We just got done shooting a big battle scene with people riding horses and yaks and camels, when this Khanid dude people called the “Executive Producer” showed up via holoprojection and berated the director for using one-hump camels instead of two-hump camels. He said two-hump camels are the traditional Khanid kind, and only barely-human Ni-Kunni use one-hump camels. The director got angry and said Chastity was a Ni-Kunni and what did it matter what kind of camels we use. It was really awkward. We got a new director the next day, and shot the scene again with two-hump camels.

What was the hardest part about playing Cheeky?
The makeup. It took them hours every day to apply it. They had pictures of this orange-haired Achuran girl with pink eye shadow wearing a Caldari uniform and the Khanid Executive Producer guy said I had to look like that at all times, even during the shower scenes with Amirah. Well, not the Caldari uniform, but the rest of it. A couple times during the holoreel, I get to mesmerize attackers with my eyes, and then Chastity hip checks them to death.

Look for Mayumi Sasaki in the holoreel Eyes for Faith coming to traditional and Aroma 3D theaters soon.

Part 2

2023.02.11
SAMANUNI III, WIYRKOMI CORPORATION FACTORY, BLACKRISE

Protesters bearing signs proclaiming “Stop SIMPing” and “No FAP” have descended upon the Seituoda Eskeitan! office in Samanuni’s Wiyrkomi station along with today’s release of the Sedevacantist 2 Church’s third holoreel, Eyes for Faith. Among the villains of the new holoreel, Seituoda Eskeitan’s SIMP 9 and FAP 7 divisions are portrayed abducting Achuran girls and forcing them into a horrific life as “idols” servicing lascivious Caldari. According to anthropologist Jakke Jarvi at the New Caldari College of Arts of Sciences, Eyes for Faith is designed to promote hatred of the Caldari people. “Every Caldari we see has a grotesquely oversized, stereotyped Civire chin and can’t keep his eyes off or his hands from grabbing Achuran women. This holoreel needs to be banned everywhere.” It is not known whether the Samanuni protesters were organized by the Sedevacantist Church, and Wiyrkomi authorities are expected to disperse the crowd quickly.

The Caldari are not alone in their reservations concerning Eyes for Faith. Across the border, spokesperson for the Federation’s small Achuran minority, Satsuki Yamazaki said that the holoreel reinforces Achuran stereotypes. “The new Achuran character, Cheeky, is a sexy magical seductress with a belt full of alchemical love potions,” she said. “Elsewhere, Achurans are shown inflicting magic curses 2 and relieving such curses by sleeping with the afflicted. The holoreel even celebrates the old custom of making brushes from the eyelashes of those defeated in battle, in this case Civire and Deteis. Eyes for Faith is prejudiced and must be banned.”

Activists weren’t the only ones unhappy with Eyes for Faith. Popular holoreel critic Pascal Lavigne declared the new holoreel “The worst of the three.” “At least with The Scent of Faith”, he continued, “one could fast forward to the love scenes and enjoy Amirah Damali’s sizzling hips. Now they’ve integrated the sermon scenes and the love scenes, so one can’t watch Amirah and newcomer Mayumi Sasaki in action without hearing Chastity whisper something about the awesomeness of slavery to Cheeky while the pair are in bed rubbing hips.”

The Amarrian Orthodox Church, Sedevacantist declined comment for this story.

Part 3

2023.05.30
LUMINAIRE VI, ESSENCE

The Gallente Federation Trade and Beverage Administration has opened an investigation into the soft drink “Soda Vacante” amid reports that the strawberry-flavored beverage exceeds regulatory limits for stimulants in a fizzy soda. Recently released by the Amarrian Orthodox Church, Sedevacantist, Soda Vacante was also approved for sacramental use by the Church’s so-called “Doctor of the Faith”, notorious capsuleer Nauplius. Church critics, however, averred that the Church needs to drug its own parishioners during the sacrament so that they don’t fall asleep during the Church’s sermons.

Asked about the controvery, actress Mayumi Sasaki, who has starred in song-and-dance holocommercials advertising Soda Vacante, enthusiastically supported the the product. “They gave me Soda Vacante to drink during the photo shoot — that’s closeups of my eyes on the can,” said the starlet. “I didn’t get tired at all, and I had so much energy we filmed some holocommercials right afterwards! I suggested they expand the line with some more flavors, but they said it was important that it only be strawberry because that’s what my character in Eyes for Faith would drink.”

Spokesperson Calyce Io denied any wrong doing on behalf of the Amarrian Orthodox Church, Sedevacantist, whose slogan Sede Vacante — meaning “The Throne is Vacant” — inspired the name of the new soda. “We have obeyed all applicable Federation laws with regard to Soda Vacante”, she said. “Obvious, Quake Corporation is working behind the scenes to remove a competitor to their inferior product. We’re going to keep pushing Soda Vacante into new markets with even more advertising featuring Mayumi.” The Gallente Federation Trade and Beverage Administration refused comment on an ongoing investigation.